Selasa, 05 Juni 2012
the 10th article (Why Some (And Only Some) Friends Stick)
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Why Some (And Only Some) Friends Stick
Once a
friendship is established through self-disclosure and reciprocity, the glue
that binds is intimacy. According to Fehr's research, people in successful
same-sex friendships seem to possess a well-developed, intuitive understanding of the give and take of intimacy. "Those who
know what to say in response to another person's self-disclosure are more
likely to develop satisfying friendships," she says. Hefty helpings of
emotional expressiveness and unconditional support are ingredients here,
followed by acceptance, loyalty, and trust. Our friends are there for us
through thick and thin, but rarely cross the line: A friend with too many
opinions about our wardrobe, our partner, or our taste in movies and art may
not be a friend for long.
When someone
embodies the rules—instinctually—their friendships are abundant indeed. Kathy
is one of my oldest friends; we were roommates in graduate school and have been
through cross-country moves, divorces, deaths, and births together. Her ability
to be a friend shines during a lousy breakup. She knows when to listen and make
sympathetic sounds, when to act good and outraged at your ex's bad behavior,
when to give you a hug, and when to tell you to stop obsessing and enjoy a
glass of wine. She knows when to offer you her couch. It's this responsiveness
that accounts for her having more friends than anyone I know—certainly more
than the five our mothers told us we were lucky to be able to count on one hand
over the course of a lifetime.
LIST OF
VOCABULARY:
· Friendship : persahabatan
· Reciprocity : timbal balik
· Intimacy : keintiman
· Intuitive : intuitif
· Expressiveness : ekspresi
· Acceptance : penerimaan
· Instinctually : naluriah
· Abundant : berlimpah
· Behavior : perilaku
· Ability : kemampuan
Complete the paragraph below based on the text!
Once a
friendship is................(1)through
self-disclosure and reciprocity, the glue that binds is intimacy. According to
Fehr's research, people in successful same-sex ……………(2) seem to possess a well-developed, intuitive understanding of the give and take of intimacy. "Those who
know what to say in response to another person's self-disclosure are more
likely to ……………(3) satisfying friendships," she
says. Hefty helpings of emotional expressiveness and unconditional support are
ingredients here, followed by acceptance, loyalty, and trust. Our friends are
there for us through thick and thin, but rarely …………(4) the line: A friend with too many opinions about our
wardrobe, our partner, or our taste in movies and art may not be a friend for
long.
When someone
embodies the rules—instinctually—their friendships are……………….(5) indeed. Kathy is one of my oldest friends; we were
roommates in graduate school and have been through cross-country moves,
divorces,………….(6), and births together. Her ability
to be a friend shines during a lousy breakup. She knows when to listen and make
sympathetic……………………(7), when to act
good and outraged at your ex's bad behavior, when to give you a hug, and when
to tell you to stop obsessing and enjoy a glass of wine. She ……………(8) when to offer you her couch. It's this responsiveness
that accounts for her having more………(9) than anyone I know—certainly more
than the five our mothers told us we were………….(10)to be able to count on one hand over the course of a
lifetime.
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